I was thinking hard about:

(1) why I have more female friends than male friends;
(2) why I prefer the company of females rather than males;
(3) why I keep running into "communication problems" with boyfriends;
(4) why I often cannot stand statements made by male friends;

and it hit me suddenly that it is because men have larger egos than women.

When I have conversations with women, I can take full liberty in everything I say. There is little need to self-censor or hold back honest beliefs. You can criticise a female friend or advise her and she will usually accept or at least acknowledge your views. Girls are schooled that they need to display modesty, virtue and femininity - which are all traits of self-control. Being criticised or limited in our ways are concepts which we become used to, whether in media portrayals or through wisdom handed down by paternalistic figures (parents, teachers, the government). Is this why women have smaller egos or don't really have egos?

It's not that boys do not face the same issue, it's just that they are shown the other face of the coin. Boys grow into men taught to aim for "higher", "faster" and "longer". Their conduct is shaped by traits of "expansiveness". And consequently, this develops into the male ego. I'm going to make a passing and unsubstantiated observation that guys are expected and expect to be glorified and celebrated, based on whatever achievements and capabilities they display. These are things that validate men more than women, although it is arguable that such trends are changing and being challenged in modern society.

When it comes down to the nugget, having an honest conversation with a man is difficult. It almost makes them flinch. In my case, this is especially true if I am being critical. Even when providing information/unsolicited advice/opinions, men do not generally take well to a female source. Their ego gets in the way. When men talk, it is competitive or combative - a display of power or an opportunity to fish for power (whether in seeking attention or an audience).

The way to soothe a man's ego is to praise him, or make yourself seem vulnerable/weak/flawed etc. And I believe that women who are more "successful" with men are women who stay out of a man's way or have simply mastered the art of deceiving guys. It is not dishonesty but rather, it's mediation. Being able to put things across in very digestible and desirable ways that strokes the male ego or doesn't destroy it. Women are stereotypically more complimentary in our style of communication. But personally, I feel that this means I cannot be 100% authentic. When it comes to people who really matter - that sucks.

Since I cannot change the world, what are my options?
(1) Accept that men are different from women & stay away. HAHAHA!
(2) Accept that men are different from women & alter my style of communication, even if it means putting on an act of some sort.

Ugh.